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Biker Wisdom Print E-mail
Tuesday, 21 February 2006



Biker Wisdom
  • Midnight Bugs taste Best.
  • Saddlebags can never hold everything you want, but they CAN hold everything you will ever need.
  • NEVER argue with a woman holding a torque wrench.
  • Never try to race an old Geezer, he may have one more gear than you.
  • Home is where your bike sits still long enough to leave a few drops of oil on the ground.
  • You'll get farther down the road if you learn to use more than two fingers on the front brake.
  • Routine maintenance should never be neglected.
  •  It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed.
  •  The only good view of a thunderstorm is in your rearview mirror. 
  •  Never be afraid to slow down. 
  •  Only Bikers understand why dogs love to stick their heads out car windows. 
  •  Bikes don't leak oil, they mark their territory. 
  •  Never ask a biker for directions if you're in a hurry to get there. 
  •  Don't ride so late into the night that you sleep through the sunrise. 
  •  Pie and Coffee are as important as gasoline. 
  •  Sometimes it takes a whole tankful of gas before you can think straight. 
  •  If you want to get a job, you may have to compromise your principals. You may even have to shave. 
  •  Riding faster than everyone else only guarantees you'll ride alone. 
  •  Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town. 
  •  Never mistake Horsepower for staying power. 
  •  A good rider has balance, judgment, and good timing. So does a good lover. 
  •  A cold hamburger can be reheated quite nicely by strapping it to an exhaust pipe and riding forty miles. 
  •  Never do less then Forty miles before breakfast. 
  •  If you don't ride in the rain-you don't ride. 
  •  A bike on the road is worth 2 in the shop. 
  •  Respect the person who has seen the Dark side of motorcycling and lived. 
  •  Young riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go. 
  •  A good wrench will let you watch without charging you for it. 
  •  Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night. 
  •  Always back your scoot into the curb-and sit where you can see it. 
  •  Work to ride-Ride to work. 
  •  Whatever it is, it's better in the wind. 
  •  Two lane blacktop isn't a highway-it's an attitude. 
  •  When you look down the road, it seems to never end-but you better believe it does. 
  •  A biker can smell a party 5,000 miles away. 
  •  Winter is Natures way of telling you to polish. 
  •  A motorcycle can't sing on the streets of a city. 
  •  Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking. 
  •  People are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently. 
  •  If the bike ain't braking properly, you don't start by rebuilding the engine. 
  •  Remember to pay as much attention to your partner as you do your carburetor. 
  •  Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes. 
  •  Well-trained reflexes are quicker than luck. 
  •  Good coffee should be indistinguishable from 50 weight motor oil. 
  •  The best alarm clock is sunshine on Chrome. 
  •  Learn to do counterintuitive things that may someday save your butt. 
  •  The twisties - not the superslabs - separate the bikers from the squids. 
  •  When you're riding lead--don't spit. 
  •  If you really want to know what's going on, watch what's happening at least 5 cars ahead. 
  •  Don't make a reputation you'll have to live down or run away from later. 
  •  If the person in the next lane at the stoplight rolls up the window and locks the door, support their view of life by snarling at them. 
  •  A friend is someone who'll get out of bed at 2am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you're broken down. 
  •  If she changes her oil more than she changes her mind--follow her. 
  •  Catchin' a June bug @ 70 mph can double your vocabulary. 
  •  If you want to get somewhere before sundown, you can't stop at every tavern. 
  •  There's something ugly about a NEW bike on a trailer. 
  •  Hunger can make even roadkill taste good. 
  •  You gotta be smart enough to understand the rules of motorcycling, and dumb enough to link the games important. 
  •  Don't lead the pack if you don't know where you're goin'. 
  •  Sleep with one arm thru the spokes and keep your pants on. 
  •  Practice wrenching on your own bike. 
  •  Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't. Some can't.  Beware the biker who says the bike never breaks down. Some bikes run on 99-octane ego. 
  • Owning 2 bikes is useful because at least one can be raided for parts at any given time. 
  •  You'll know she loves you if she offers to let you ride her bike. Don't do it and she'll love you even more. 
  •  Don't argue with an 18-wheeler. 
  •  Never be ashamed to unlearn an old habit. 
  •  Maintenance is as much art as it is science. 
  •  A good long ride can clear your mind, restore your faith, and use up a lot of gasoline. 
  •  If the countryside seems boring, stop, get off your bike, and go sit in the ditch long enough to appreciate what was here before the asphalt came. 
  •  If you can't get it goin' with bungee cords and electricians tape-it's serious. 
  •  If you ride like there's no tomorrow-there won't be. 
  •  Bikes parked out front means good chicken-fried steak inside. 
  •  If you want to complain about the pace being set by the road captain, you better be prepared to lead the group yourself. 
  •  Gray-haired bikers don't get that way from pure luck. 
  •  There are drunk bikers. There are old bikers. There are NO old, drunk bikers. 
  •  Thin leather looks good in the bar, but it won't save you from "road rash" if you go down. 
  •  The best modifications cannot be seen from the outside. 
  •  Always replace the cheapest parts first. 
  •  You can forget what you do for a living when your knees are in the breeze. 
  •  No matter what marque you ride, it's all the same wind. 
  •  It takes both pistons and cylinders to make a bike run. One is not more important than the other.

Quoted from "Sit Down, Shut Up & Hang On, A Biker's Guide to Life, by Penny Powers and Chuck Hays.



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